Monday, June 22, 2009

Changes and Promises

So Acu switched to today (instead of Thursday) because Debi is going out of town for 2 weeks and I didn't want to miss out on a full week. I've felt really different for a couple days now. Not sick, not tired, just (for lack of a better word) enlightened. I hope it is what I want it to be, but not sure until July 3rd. So after Debi put all the needles into the points she wanted to, she always dims the lights and leaves the room for 15-20 minutes. During that time I do different things - take a little nap, think about what to pick up at the grocery store, talk to God or my un-born baby to come, etc. Today was the last and it literally gave me chills. I started making promises and hoping that that would help the baby "adhere" to my uteran wall. So here is the list I started with. Don't know if this will come out as poetic or not, but here are my promises. I repeated many of them over and over again, almost bringing myself to tears and will probably have to add to this list because I am sure I forgot a lot.

Promises to my future child
I will provide you with warmth and comfort, in my belly and for the rest of your life.
I will do everything in my power to keep you healthy and help you grow to the best person you can be.
I will love you like no other human on Earth has been loved.
I will keep you safe while you are growing in my body and as much as I can when you are out.
I will let you have your space and learn your own lessons, while protecting you from harms I know exist.
I will do whatever the doctors tell me to do to keep you healthy always.
No matter how imperfect you are, you will always be perfect to me.
My body is ready for you. I am ready to carry you. Your Daddy, Grandparents and "Aunts" and "Uncles" are ready to meet you.
Now is the time, I can feel it. Maybe this month isn't the time, but I am healthier, happier and ready to receive your heart, to add to the soul I already carry.
I promise to hold you whenever you need holding, and let you go when the time is right.
I promise to listen to what you tell me, to what God tells me and to listen to my heart.
I will never give up on you, no matter what the situation.
I promise to show you right from wrong, good from bad, and let you make mistakes.
I will always be thankful for the gift you have given me, your life.
Now is the time, angel baby, now is the time.
We are ready, we are so ready! Please join us!

That's all I can remember right now, and it didn't come out poetic at all. But this is what I meditated during Acu today. Now we just wait until July 3rd. Pray for us!

Oh, before I forget! Jason got a kind of promotion today. He is now in charge of used cars and customer cars, so hopefully will get more hours which mean bigger pay checks! Always a plus! And his boss went over the other boss' head to make sure Jason got the job and not anyone else! YAY! Finally something good happens at his work! It is about damn time! He deserves to be treated so much better, maybe this is the start of new things for us all! Cross fingers if they aren't already!

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