June 28th

Good afternoon Bleaders.  How have you been?  I guess I always ask that because I feel like we're having a conversation...however one-sided it may be.  (smile).

Yesterday could have been a little bitter for me.  Had we done our transfer on June 19th as planned, yesterday would have been the day we found out if we were pregnant or not.  I tried not to think about it, but it kept popping into my head every-so-often.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm now very glad that we didn't do the transfer on the 19th because of all the pain I was having.  Can you imagine if I'd been having that AND knew that I had 1 or 2 viable embryos in me?!  I would have been a wreck not knowing what was going on in my uterus.  It also gave me a little break from all the drugs, stress and restrictive diet.  Kind of a breath of fresh air.  And now we're ready to get back down to the business of baby making.

So how did I cope with yesterday?  I worked.  And I perfected the Fertility Binder for Holly.  It is now complete and has been dropped off.  Let's hope orders start coming in!  The sewing part takes a bit longer than I remember, but I know that once I start making them repeatedly, I'll get better at it again and it will be a breeze.  I worked on the binders on Sunday afternoon too, and got quite frustrated with my sewing machine.  At one point after rethreading the needle for the umtheenth time, I pushed the material in and literally willed the sewing machine to start.  It took me a minute after the machine wasn't moving to realize that my feet were tucked under me, and there was no power to tell it to move.  Silly Nikus!

I'm very happy with the finished product and had lots of help from Liz (Womb for Improvement) who let me pilfer her wonderful poem (IF) and Volleyball Queen who had lots of ideas about funner things to include that we Infertiles sometimes forget about in the process.  Also had some thoughts from Heather and Ashlee!  Thanks for everyone's input.  I'll post pictures later this week for all to see, and maybe buy!  I almost didn't want to give the cover up because I'd spent so much time making it perfect that I wanted to keep it for our baby binder which is waiting in the wings!  But I realized that I could make another one for me later!

Then last night I got a text from Super-Mom telling me that another friend of hers who had just done her first round of IVF with Dr. H found out she was pregnant with twins yesterday.  So hopefully good karma is around for us next month!  I told J about Super-Mom's text and he took it as a good omen.  Which opened me up for the ability to see what he thinks about twins.  (I know people think I am insane but ever since I had friends who were twins (yes, they still are) in the 5th grade, I secretly have wanted to have twins!)  I asked J what he thought about getting pregnant with twins and he said he'd like that, especially given all the problems we've had and the fact that we both want two kiddos.  So at least we're in agreement about putting 2 embryos back in, now to get Dr. H on board!  He doesn't want to because I'm younger than 35 and healthy.  But 2 just feels better to me.  Will talk to him at our ultrasound on the 21st before transfer on the 28th of July.

I thought this whole baby thing was going to go out the window after J and I watched Leno who had Tom Papa on (from The Marriage Ref) on Monday night.  Tom Papa has a special place in my heart because besides being hysterical, he was actually mc-ing at my work conferences for a few years before he started hosting The Marriage Ref gig.  And even after he did the first season, he was at our conference last year.  So he feels like the celebrity I "know" a bit.  Anyway, here's the bit he did.  And while we were both laughing like crazy, the back of my mind was a little concerned J would put the kibash on everything, but he didn't.  Whew!  Enjoy!  (For those of you reading via email, click here to be taken to the blog website to watch Tom Papa, totally worth it!)