Hello dear Bleaders! WOW, ask and you shall receive! I asked for opinions and boy did I get them. WOWIE-ZOWIE! Thank you for your input. Yes, it's a decision I have to make, but I wanted other opinions. At this point, we won't be doing number 3 (which was basically drop everything and start NOW). I'm still considering #2 (start end of April) and #1 (wait until May after have grades). I've got some time to mull it all over and determine how to proceed with this.
Now on to the real post for today, but wanted to reiterate my thanks not only for your opinions, but your constant support. You guys are with me on the good, the bad and the ugly days. It's appreciated more than you know. I'm very happy I started the blog just about 2 years ago, despite the fact that it wasn't under the happiest of circumstances. I'm grateful for the people I have connected with through this (hear me My Kate?!) and the support you give, on and off the blog. If someone had told me when we started trying to conceive about 4 years ago (yes, 4 years in July) that this would be our journey, I might have given up then and there. But no one had that foresight. Now looking back, I can realize that this happened for a reason and while I'm not really sure what that reason is (although I've come up with a ton in my head), I feel like I've grown and possibly can handle parent-hood better now than had I gotten knocked up on the first try and not really had to determine if I wanted this or not. (No offense to any Fertile Myrtles out there). So if I haven't lost you yet, here we go...
We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons. - Jim Rohn
This was my "weekly quote" from Quoteland.com. It probably fits today well. I wasn't very happy when I weighed in at WW this morning, up a little bit. I understand why (ahem...Daddy look away), AF is on her way. (Okay, you can continue to read Daddy!) But I worked hard last week at staying on track and doing things right. It's really annoying. So this quote hit home with me this morning. I can't say I regret last week when I worked out almost every morning that I am slated too (discipline). I'm just angry and annoyed that Mr. Scale doesn't want to go downhill, only uphill! BOO!
Now moving on to CFP. I was very disciplined with my study so even if I don't pass, I don't think I can look back at the situation and say I didn't give it my all. I was bustin' ass to cram everything I could in my brain. We'll see if it paid off. I hope so. I seriously don't believe there is anything further I could have done to make this experience any better.
And lastly, our infertility journey. This one is a bit of a toughie. As I said up top, I have grown from this whole experience. I feel like I am a natural Mom. It's just there, ingrained in me. Can't help it. Every baby I see on the street makes me gaze a little longer, just to see them and fantasize that someday that will be us. But do I regret not starting earlier? Probably a little bit. Do I regret all the money I spent on BC when I probably didn't need to? Yes and no. Yes, because I could have done plenty of other stuff with that $20 a month and it's quite possible that all those years on it have something to do with our current situation. No, because we weren't ready to be parents then. We could have split up (I doubt it) or been disgruntled parents because a child came to us too soon. We've had time to enjoy each other and figure ourselves and our marriage out. We just weren't ready. Now we are.
I don't quite know how discipline weighs into all this, except that maybe I try to be more disciplined with myself as far as taking care of me and our finances, knowing what lies up ahead. Let's go with that. I definitely try to eat healthier and make J eat healthier. Working out really isn't a chore most mornings. Part of that is because I have found workouts I love, or at the very least, people I love that encourage me to workout with them or because of them. I watch our money closely, knowing that big expenses are coming up, and don't spend as wildly as I did in my youth, knowing that a child will be expensive after they are born as well as before.
But seriously, I don't regret where we are. Sometimes I hate it, but I don't regret it.
So I agree with the above quote. I'd much rather have the pain of discipline, than the pain of regret!
What does this quote mean for you?
It pains me to leave you all, but I must! Happy Tuesday!