Wow, I slow down on writing just for a bit and lose some followers! OW...pride is hurt a bit Bleaders. Anyway, thanks for those still with me. I know my writing has drifted a bit from infertility, but it's on a back burner right now. Gotta get through big nasty first! Not gonna do CFP and IVF together...I think I might implode!
So when I last wrote I was wallowing over not passing CFP. I have gotten over that, mostly. I re-enrolled in the test and found a different cram course (over Valentine's Day week, boo). I will get this done. I will go to Denver for my cram course (and on the side see some friends beforehand, yay). And I will pass. End of story. I will pass. (BTW, my friend who took it on her second go round passed, so I AM OVERJOYED and FILLED WITH HOPE!)
Something infertility related that happened that I have been meaning to share is J and my visit to his doctor. His regular doctor. I don't know about the rest of you, but getting DH to go to the doctor is WORSE than pulling teeth! (He doesn't go to the dentist either, but his teeth are pretty nice...although once kiddies start to go, that will be on the table for discussion.) Anyway, it was time for J's annual appointment. He needed bloodwork done and that in itself was a drama, but he got it done.
I go with him for his visits as "4 ears is better than 2," but I think he's really kinda nervous. I won't bore you with all the little topics of discussion, but there is one tidbit I'll share.
Dr. C is very good. He's kind and listens and doesn't rush. He said,"Last year you said you were trying to get pregnant, how's that going?" I piped up with, "We're gonna do IVF this year." Dr. C looked at J and said, "Do we know what the issue is?" We both shook our head. And then J just started talking and I was in a trance.
He said something to the effect of, "it just sucks that all of our friends get pregnant so quick and we have issues. I wish it could just be as easy for us. Plus the money! IVF isn't cheap. But we want to be parents so bad."
Now, we talk about this and discuss how to get there. But to hear him open up to someone else, a man no less, about his feelings seriously made my heart swell. Especially to hear him say he feels the same way I do in his own words. I am really NOT alone in this struggle. And as many times that I may roll my eyes at something silly he did or annoying thing he said, he is the right guy for the job. The job of being my husband and the father of my children. Happy Nikus!
Changing lanes...this weekend J went camping so I was on my own. We've kinda been on each other's nerves so it's not a bad thing. He likes to sleep outside in the cold, and I prefer the warm bed. Plus we get a little chance to make the heart grow fonder. And it did.
So I hung out with my Grandma who is in town. We ate out, we watched movies, we caught up. I also went to a movie and lunch with Ms. T and just chilled. This morning, I just chilled in bed and watched "The Back-up Plan." Very cute and fun. And while it wasn't really about infertility since J.Lo. wants to be preggers but has no man, it was a nice different story for once. Definitely worth a trip to Red Box!
And now, off to finish some chores before the weekend ends. Happy Last Full Week of January folks!
I agree with you. It's always nice to know your husband is on the same page. They can be so tight lipped by comparison to us.
ReplyDeleteGlad you are back! :-)
I've been kinda MIA and I'm just catching up. Catching up required a bit more crying than I would have liked. I'm so sorry for all you're going through. I love you and I miss you. I know life is crazy for us both, but if we can find time to meet up, I'd love to see you. xoxo, you are always in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteHey Nikus by the way my hubby is also impossible to get to the doc - took months of complaining to get him to go to the physio for his back. Glad that he did open up and you had some time for yourself. I also liked the backup plan.
ReplyDeletebest wishes
H
It takes more than you not posting to get me to break up with you :) I heart J. He sounds awesome.
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