I wish I had the patience to write a bunch right now, but I just don't. To make it snappy, today was a really rough day. I was really productive this morning and had a work lunch. Then came home to study and that is what has me depressed.
I got the first module down pretty quick (albeit while we were on vacation) of my CFP (aka big nasty) cram course down and moved onto the second. Finished the book and moved onto the quizzes on my computer, only to be stopped dead in my tracks. It felt like I had never seen this stuff in my life even though I had JUST finished the book and had passed the course back in 2008 (I think). I went through 3 quizzes in 4 hours (mind you, only 25 questions each) and didn't pass a single one. I felt broken. It was the first time I actually considered postponing the test until March 2011.
Trust me, the last thing I want is for this to drag on for another 6 months, but I also really don't want to have to take it twice! I don't think I have ever felt this defeated...I take that back, the first time was our first IUI that didn't work. But this felt horrid! I felt so very stupid.
I emailed the professor of the cram course with questions I had bumped into and my concerns, hoping he could lead me in the right direction. I do remember when taking the course for this module many moons ago hearing it was the hardest of them all and now I remember why. I have plans to review my notes from that course and see what I can dig up, but I am hopeful the professor will bring to light some things that I have forgotten and give me a little hope. Because right now, I'm out.
Having been up since about 5:30 am, I am beat. Night folks. Told you I wouldn't be posting as much because of this thing. Sorry to have to live up to that.