Hello folks. Today is my 31st birthday. So in lieu of what I have accomplished to this point, I asked my Mom to tell about my birth. A couple notes...my parents had no issues conceiving me what-so-ever. In fact, they kind of got their weeks messed up when they were trying not to conceive, and there I was 9 months later. So here's that story.
The Story of Nikus’s birth
As remembered on November 23, 2008 by her Mother
On Thanksgiving Day, I didn’t eat turkey dinner; I just didn’t like the idea of food.However, when the pecan pie was served about 6 pm at Phyllis and Bud’s (my Dad's parents) house, I ate a big piece!(I never was a big fan of pecan pie!)I must have been huge, since my due date was the very next day!
I remember waking early, about 4 am, with weak labor pains.I prepared:I washed my hair, gathered my things together, before waking Daniel (my Dad) about 5 to tell him that I thought it was time to go.He drove me to TMC in the pickup truck and we checked in.
My water broke just as I got into the hospital bed.(Great timing!What a mess that would have been in the truck!)Labor pains intensified.Soon I was begging for relief which came in the form of an epidural, about 8 am.The anesthesiologist would administer a shot in my lower back to “deaden” the lower half of my body.I could see the contractions happening on the monitor but couldn’t feel them.The epidural lasted for an hour.Then we had to find the anesthesiologist to ask for another shot.It took awhile to find him and I was in major pain by the time he came so I learned to send Daniel to search for him at the 45 minute mark so he’d be in my room ready to give me the next shot just before the prior one wore off.(I’m such a wimp about pain!)I remember getting six shots!And that took a LONG time to work itself out of my body after you were born.
At 12:45 pm, the doctor and the nurse checked me and said, “This baby isn’t coming.You aren’t dilated enough.We’re going to need to do a C-Section.”The doc left the room to get prepared and the nurse said, “Let’s pray that your baby hears us and decides to make an appearance so that you don’t have to go to surgery.”(A C-Section was major surgery and would have meant a 2 week recovery.)
Daniel went into the bathroom to gown himself for the surgery.The doc came back and said, “Thank God!You are completely dilated, the baby is crowning.It’s time!Let’s go to the birthing room.”They pushed my bed down the hall quickly.
Daniel came out of the bathroom to an empty room.He walked into several birthing rooms before he found me but he got there in time to see you being born.
You were healthy, pink and as responsive as a baby needs to be.The nurses guessed at your weight before you were born:one said eight pounds, 3 ounces and the other said eight pounds, four ounces.You were born between 1 and 2 pm and weighed 8 pounds, 3½ ounces!
Daniel and I married on Saturday, November 23, 1974 in Muncie, Indiana.You were born on Friday, November 23, 1979, five years to the hour, adjusted for the time change, of our wedding.
We stayed in the hospital Friday and Saturday and came home on Sunday.I spent the next six weeks at home with you but did bank reconciliations for my employer at home because I needed things to occupymy mind.
Daniel was the best husband and father!I nudged him awake in the middle of the night when I heard you crying.He’d go to your room on the other side of the house, change your diaper, bring you to me and I’d nurse you.When you were full, I’d elbow him again, and he’d take you back to your crib.
I nursed you for seven months, expressing milk in the office bathroom, brought it home in a cooler, froze it, then thawed it a day later for the babysitter to use.
I stopped breast feeding after the Iowa trip in June, 1980, for Daisy’s (my aunt) wedding.That was the wedding that Uncle Leo met Aunt Shawna because she babysat you while Daniel and I were involved with Daisy’s wedding.(Shawna was the groom's cousin.)
So that's the story as told by my Mom, written out a couple years ago. And I leave you with that. Happy Birthday to me and Happy Anniversary to my parents!
Hello my lovely Bleaders! Thank you for NOT deserting me in my time of CFP and relative insanity! I'm going to try and do a quick run-down of the events of last week and get it out of my system for good - forgive me if you have already heard these stories from me directly as I talked to a number of you recently! (And by the way, thanks for that!) I would say this will be my last post about CFP, but that probably isn't the case...especially since I don't know my score yet. Bear with me...
Let's see...where did we leave off? Ahh...yes, Wednesday of last week. Still studying my eyes out and still having some struggles.
Thursday morning, I did manage to go to boot camp for some last minute inspiration from my ladies and they didn't disappoint! Came home, packed, studied and drove to Phoenix, all-the-while trying to breathe deep and build myself up. Checked into the hotel and was relatively surprised at how nice it was. Got settled, checked in with the office for the last time, and then got set up to study. That was when I realized the room had INCREDIBLY thin walls. The "neighbors" came home and started to watch TV. Only problem was, I was knee-deep in study mode and that works best in absolute silence. So after battling a bit with earplugs and trying to stay calm, I gave up on studying until later. The hotel had a free "social" hour, so I headed down for my two free glasses of wine, which I brought back to the room and stuck in the fridge before heading out to find dinner. Gotta love Qdoba! It was way yum and way too much, so I had enough for lunch the next day. When I returned back to the hotel, called J to catch up on his day and ate dinner. Studied a bit more, watched some TV (studied through the commercials) and then decided it was time for bed - neighbors were still MIA...until I turned the lights off! Then, they came in and the TV went from silent to blaring. After battling a little over 30 minutes trying to go to sleep, I finally called the front desk and asked them very nicely to call the neighbors and ask them to turn the TV down. They thankfully did, but the walls were so thin it really didn't help all that much. I may have finally drifted off to sleep about 11 or 12. So much for getting a good night's sleep.
Friday, test day one. I tend to do better on tests if I get up and work out before. Nothing crazy, just get the blood pumping and the mind working, so that was my plan. I figured out a schedule so I could get to the test on time, have lunch, and still have some time to study that morning. So I was up about 6 am and headed to the "swanky" gym at the hotel (1 exercise bike, 1 elliptical and 1 treadmill, oh and a flat screen TV - WOW!) and hopped on the elliptical, flashcards in hand for some review. Managed to get through the flashcards just about the time my 30 minutes were up, perfect. Stopped at the cafe for my free breakfast (eggs, sausage links, hash browns, oranges, coffee, toast, etc. - pretty good selection although I really wasn't all that hungry...nerves were acting up in my stomach) and took a little break. Then it was back to the room to shower and study some more. Got settled and went through the questions I had previously gotten wrong on practice tests to decipher if I could get them right and did pretty well. Lunch real quick - thank you Qdoba leftovers that were still very yum!
Then it was time to head out. WOW, very scary. Found my way to the testing site easily enough and finally found the correct building...as I watched people walking in with faces of scared-ness. Parked, gave myself one last pep talk and walked in. As I was walking, a guy was coming up from the parking lot too and I looked at him, he looked at me, then said, "You ready for the CFP?" I asked how he knew and he said, "You have the same look on you face, that I feel I have on mine." I replied back, "Sheer terror?!" He laughed. So he became my buddy, but we never swapped names. Anyway, walked in and bantered a bit about nerves, questions, etc. Finally got called to our rooms, and what-do-you-know, he was in mine. There were probably 15 people in my room, 1 other female. I joked to her that we had to "represent" because we were the minority! Oh, and I had found a shirt at Target a couple days before that was purple (ahem - favorite color) and said "Believe" on it in rhinestones...talk about a perfect shirt for the CFP, so was wearing that. A couple people said something about that too. I said, "I need all the help I can get!"
We checked in, IDs checked, registration ticket checked and were assigned a seat. Once everyone was seated, they started the instructions...lots of them. Passed out the booklet that is SEALED shut and the scantron sheet. Here's how you fill in your name. Here's how you fill in your numbers. Yada yada. Finally, "open your test booklets and begin." The ripping sound in the room was deafening as everyone dove in. I would love to tell you what the first question was, but honestly, I have no clue. Friday's test was 115 questions in 4 hours, so my brain was spent. A couple interesting things during the test...let's see, the guy next to me was a knuckle-cracker, so about every couple minutes that was enjoyable. About half way, I heard movement so I looked up to see the other woman in the room handing her test booklet in and packing up her things. How could she be done?! I was barely half-way! Holy cow! I decided either she really knew her stuff, or she had NO CLUE! Whatever, back to me. About hour 3.5, other people started getting up to turn in their books and leave, while I still scooted along. I knew how many questions I had to get through each hour and had been doing well, but got laid up by the case study, so now I was trying to be a little quicker just to make sure I got all the questions ANSWERED! Finally made it and 2 minutes later (as I was checking another question) the proctor said, "Pencils down." Day one was complete. Of course they had to collect the tests from us and then we were finally dismissed. I walked out and had no thoughts. None. I was empty. Mom had left me a message telling me she was proud, no matter the outcome, so that was nice to walk out and hear since no one was there with me.
I have a few friends in Phoenix and they had all expressed desire to go to dinner or something while I was there, but I put them off saying I won't know until the test is over how I feel. I decided I did need some interaction and I did have to eat, so dinner would be great. Called my friend who I haven't seen forever, and she agreed to come get me so we could go to dinner. She had to go pick up her son, so I scooted back to the hotel (which took me 40 minutes - even though it had taken me 20 at noon - which is why I don't like Phoenix very much) and got my free wine for the night. I anticipated drinking the wine when I got back, but instead downed it then and there as I waited, which wasn't very long for my friend. She found the hotel and we went across the street to 5-&-Diner for dinner. It was nice and we split something so not too terrible for me. I haven't seen her son since he was probably 1, and now he is 6, so that was quite incredible. We just talked and tried to catch up, but having not seen each other for that long, it proved difficult. I was also watching my clock so I wouldn't get to bed too late. We departed about 8 I think and she dropped me off at the hotel. Amazingly, my neighbors weren't there. So I got a little studying done, really just looking up some things I had questions about and reviewing what I could. Tried to go to bed early, but what do you know, the neighbors were back! Lovely. Let me tell you, they were watching David Letterman...couldn't hear the jokes, but knew the voice. Man, those walls were thin. I stuck my earplugs in, prayed for the best and fell asleep maybe after an hour, only to be up again at 1 and 2 and possibly 3 with loud people coming back from bars or something down the hallway. Again, not as restful as I would have hoped. But, what can you do?
Side note: I did my best all week to amp myself up for this test. Had bought a new CD by Katy Perry and found this song that did it all for me. So I share with you. (Email folks, you may have to click the link to see it...totally worth it!)
Okay, back to my story...Saturday morning, despite my best efforts, I was up about 5:30 am. So, to the gym for a little workout again and study-time. Got to the gym and my key-card didn't work. Uh oh. That made me think it wouldn't work at my room! Got back to my room and it did work, so called the front desk and they sent the security guy to the door. I met him there and his didn't work. After messing with it for a bit, he went for the "old-fashioned" key (you know, the metal one!) and couldn't get the cover off the lock. Asked me if I could "come back in a bit?" to which I, probably sounded a little crazy when I said, "NO! I can't, it's now or never." He wandered away to call for help and I messed with the cover, and managed to get it off in his absence. Called him back over and he let me in. YAY! One victory. Chose the bike that day and went through my notes for 30 minutes while I cycled away on the "fat burner" cycle. Grabbed breakfast again before heading back to the room...was joined that morning by 4 kitties that were wandering around, so of course I fed them sausage and milk from the buffet, which they loved, the minute I walked away. Back to the room, showered, packed up and headed to the desk to check out, commenting on the thinness of the walls to the clerk. Then headed to the test site again, with still time to spare to study in the car. Again, reviewed my notes and then it was time to head in. This time, took in my water (which I had left out the day before because they told me I couldn't have it, but many people did) and my bag with snacks, just in case. Caught up with the guy from the day before, and we chatted a bit about our scoring theories and how we did the day before. Both of us commented on the chickie that had left at the half-way point, wondering if she would be back. Time to check in and our girl was there, so away we went. Same instructions about filling in name, number, etc. We started early because now everyone knew what to do. And away we went - 85 questions in 3 hours.
Even though I had just had breakfast, my stomach started growling (quite loudly to me) about an hour and a half in. So I asked if I could go outside and have some almonds that I had brought with me. It was approved and that did make me feel better. Upon my return, I looked at the other woman in the room and wouldn't you know it, she was packing up! How in the devil was she doing this?! INSANE! No one else left until at least 45 minutes later! I plowed through and again stayed until the very last. We now had about an hour and 15 minutes for lunch. Headed to the car and thankfully I have GPS on my phone (I had planned on eating at the cafe at the school, but it was closed on Sat and Sun) so I found a gyro place and was quite happy with that, only to discover once I got there that it was closed! GPS'd again and found a sandwich place that was close by, so got there quite quickly. Texted back and forth to J a bit (remember, he was in Globe, AZ for Grandma Jo's funeral) so our chat was quick because people were starting to arrive. Mom had left me a message while I was testing so I listened to that while I ate, but didn't call her back knowing she was on her way to Globe for the funeral, after having issues at home with some plumbing apparently. Back to the test site and parked the car next to someone else studying in her car. She had the windows rolled down, so I rolled mine down and said, "What are you struggling with?" She replied, "I'm taking this big test today here." I said, "CFP? Me too." She lightened and we figured out we had the same test (there were 2 books in each session so people wouldn't cheat). We ran through some questions that had given us issues and it came out that it was her second time taking the test. We began our walk to the testing rooms, stopping at the bathroom and I told her about the girl in our room that was always done at the half-way mark. As we exited the bathroom, that girl was there so I excused myself briefly to ask her for her secret. She laughed and then quite seriously said, "I'm unprepared." Her friend said that wasn't the case, but she insisted. I smiled and wished her good luck again, then rejoined my new friend. Just before we went our separate ways, my new friend asked what company I worked for and upon telling her, she replied, "me too!" We agreed to wait around for each other so we could swap info after the test was over. And away we went...last session.
At this point, we're all a little loopy. We've already done 200 questions and have 85 more to go. My buddy in my room, said something to the girl who was leaving early about not letting her out (since he was seated by the door) if she tried to leave at the half way mark. She smiled. We began again with the instructions and then the test. And, I looked up at the half-way mark again and there she was, standing up to leave. I chuckled to myself and continued on. At this point, I am getting really tired of testing. Every question I think I know and then they throw something in that derails me! I did the best I could, of course staying until the last. I actually had about 30 minutes to review some problem questions when I finished, so did that and because it was me and one other guy, we both agreed to be done and we were let out a couple minutes early. You are allowed to tell the testing board of questions that you don't see as fair for one reason or another, so I wrote down one that just seemed un-feasible. At the very least, they review it and possibly throw it out. I exited and again, I'm empty. I have no thought. My new friend wasn't done yet, so I walked outside, sent a text to many friends saying I was done and my "fate was sealed." Finally, my friend came out and she said she felt devastated. I won't say that I felt that way, but I definitely felt like I would be lucky to pass. So many questions with so many little details, probably 25% that I deal with on a daily basis in real life. We compared answers of questions we remembered for a while. I gave her my card so she could email me and we could keep in touch back at the office. Finally asked what planner she worked for and low-and-behold, it is a good friend of my Mom's. So I have a feeling we'll be talking more and more. Finally, after an hour of comparing notes, sob stories and what parts of life we can now get back to, we said our good-byes and I headed for home.
Found my way to the freeway, and called my Dad back who had called while I was talking to my new friend, Anna. We talked about my day and his day (he hadn't been able to go to the funeral because of the plumbing issues at the house) and how things were. Finally, off the phone and just driving. Called a couple other people to download and tried to find my Mom and J, knowing they were together and should be heading home from Globe by now. Finally caught up with them and downloaded the day's events, as well as my new friend, Anna's story. Beat J to the house and got a huge welcoming from the animals, then unloaded and about that time, J got home. He had told me he was bringing dinner from Globe, so I just needed a drink at that point. Sat for a while and discussed the events of the day, while I ate and finally were able to relax and watch TV. We were both exhausted so headed to bed relatively early for a Saturday night.
Oh - one more thing to remember. Remember how I talked about the guy in the cram class (Father-of-Twins) that hadn't studied and asked a lot of not-so-smart questions? Well, I looked for him at the test and I didn't see him. Said something to new-friend-Anna who was in the room that had A last names, and she asked if his name started with J. I said yes and she said that there was someone who was supposed to be in their room but never checked in with J for first initial and A for last. I'm just sayin', that's probably him! He didn't show. Now this test costs $600 to take, and after October 5th or something, you can't get your money back. So what a moron he is for not even attempting it and seeing how it felt, even if he was sure he wouldn't pass. Again, he is an ASU supporter...I'm just sayin'. He might have helped my "curve" if he was there! ;)
Now I know what you are gonna say, "how do you think you did?" and I really don't want to answer that question. Don't get me wrong, I knew some answers right off the bat. But others, like I said before totally threw me and more than a few I totally guessed on. I don't get my score until January, so hopefully I'll be able to relax through the holidays. And, if I don't pass, well, then I do it again. At least now I know what it feels like and a couple things to review. I'll get it done...either this time or another.
I know I have said it before, but I will say it again. Thank you SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much for all the love and support you guys give me, about CFP and all the other stuff. It does make a difference and I appreciate it greatly!
I'm off to find some coffee and possibly get in the hot tub. Have a great one folks!
Hello folks, it's been a long week. A very L-O-N-G week, and it's only Wednesday. This will probably be my last post before big nasty ensues!
When last we left, Grandma Jo had just passed and we were recovering...that was very difficult. You think about calling her, and then you realize you can't. But, on the upside, I think her hand is behind me as I go for my test! She always had questions about finances, and while she might not listen to her son (J's Dad), she always at least pretended to listen to what financial advice I had for her. ;)
Studying was progressing, but very slowly and painfully. It didn't help that AF showed up Monday Tuesday (I thought she got in Monday, but Tuesday she proved she didn't until Tuesday). It was a rough one...I was laid out, opting between curled in a ball on the bed and looking for more pain killers. Boot camp was a "hell-no-go" and the rest of the day I felt pretty blah...actually studied in bed and took a 4-hour practice exam. Yup, 4 hours. But somehow I finished about hour 3 and got my highest score to date - yesterday. Still wasn't over passing, but 1 question away! Then, last night, J brought in my birthday card from Grandma Jo. Wow, it was like she knew what was happening. It was all about believing in yourself. Who is to say that someone (from above) isn't leading our hand when we pick cards like that? Not me. So yup, cried last night.
Today, there was a different energy about than the last 2 days. I've felt a bit better on the AF front, and almost energized. I don't know if the adrenaline has started to brew or what, but I took a 3 hour practice test today and get this, scored WAY ABOVE passing! There is hope! I also re-wrote a bunch of my notes today so they would be ingrained in my head, the couple subjects that I struggle with - that was before the test. I felt better as I wrote down the last answer, and then had some intrepidation as I went to score it. Star after star after star, and as I tallied, hey, way below the amount of wrong answers that would have failed me!
Tomorrow, I'll go to boot camp (if it kills me, or Meanie Christinie probably will), take the last practice exam, then head to Phoenix. Study a little more in the afternoon, and then relax with a glass of wine. Friday, the fun begins. Test starts at 1 pm (so send prayers before then for calmness) and goes until 5 pm. Saturday, there's 2 separate sections 9-noon and 1:30-4:30 pm. So again, prayers before then would be great. I plan to workout in the morning, at least a little bit, with flash cards in hand, and run a couple questions just to get me in the right mentality. Then, here goes nothing.
So when we meet next, I'll probably be drunk. Just kidding, I won't write while I'm drunk! ;) I anticipate being more relaxed, because at that point, all I can do is wait and I can't change my fate at that point. (Remind me of this notion when I start blathering on about how I think I failed and what not okay?!)
Off to do a quick study of my notes that I want to remember to transfer to the scratch paper when I get into the test, then make something for dinner and finish up the laundry.
Have a wonderful evening y'all, and before I forget, thank you so much for all the support you have offered here, in person or just via prayer. I've needed it and I've felt the love. So thanks again! Just don't stop until Sat, I mean January when I get my score!
To be honest, my head should surely be in a book right now, especially with events of yesterday, but I feel the need to write so I can get some things off my chest and go back to concentrating.
J's grandma Josephine (Jo) is 82. She fell on Monday and has been slowly declining ever since. At one point, we thought she would be fine, but yesterday morning we were told that wasn't the case anymore. After a good bout of crying from both of us (I always cry, but J never does, so that was hard to see), we decided to drive to see her. We picked up J's sister along the way and headed to Mesa (2 hours away). She was moderately coherent when we saw her initially, but that went down quickly. We tried to wait for her last breath, but she wouldn't give up. She's always been a tough lady, and last night she showed us her colors. She wasn't giving up without a fight. At 8 pm, J's parents essentially kicked us out because we still had to drive home, but Jo was still holding tough. We tearily said "good-bye" for what we anticipated to be the last time. Telling her we were okay and she could let go. When I called about 10 pm to tell J's mom we were home, she verified that Jo was still alive and didn't show signs of going anywhere. J's dad called at 5:30 am this morning and I assumed, without getting up that she was gone, but when we got up this morning J told me that his dad was just reporting that she was still alive and her heart was beating like crazy. So now we wait.
So yesterday, there wasn't a whole lot of studying going on. A lot of crying, yes, studying, no. I did manage to study on the trip up...despite the radio on and the conversation between J and his sister (so now I know I can do this with distractions!). But 2 things happened yesterday that I do want to write about.
At one point, as we all were sitting around talking about Jo, it grew very silent in the room and without warning, J's dad said, "You guys are gonna get pregnant now!" His voice cracked when he said those words. I lost it. Although I had cried most of the day, I hadn't outright sobbed and I have never cried like that in front of his family. Well, that went out the window right quick. I broke down. J's parents know how we have struggled and have been amazing at not pushing for grandkids, even though we know they want them bad and we're the only hope for various reasons, going so far as to defend us to their parents who are also ready for great-grandkids, Jo included. Some people might read this and think he shouldn't have said that, but that is not how it came out at all. It was said with love and hope and because of the feeling that hung over the room, I had the same thoughts running through my head and he had just said them out loud. J's sister hugged me, which again doesn't happen often and comforted me. Jo really wanted great-grand-babies, and I had the fleeting notion that I had let her down by not having them by now. When I told J that on the way home last night, he quickly told me that was not the case and I told him I knew, but I couldn't help thinking that. He also then commented, "you know, if we do get pregnant quickly now, what her middle name is gonna be." I smiled, because I had already noted that myself.
The second thing really didn't happen until this morning. I do feel bad about not studying yesterday, but given the events of yesterday, the CFP just doesn't seem as important now. Don't get me wrong, I know it is a big deal but I have been so focused on it that yesterday seemed to be a blatent reminder that there are other things that matter more. J has thanked me time and time again for going to Mesa with him yesterday, know what was resting on my shoulders. But this morning as I made coffee and thought about yesterday, I had the thought that "well, if I don't pass, the world won't end" and "there are things more important than a test." Now, that doesn't mean I have given up or will not be studying my heart out until next Friday (ahhhh!!!), but (and you may need to remind me of this in January if I don't pass), it is just a test. It's not a life. I think that revelation actually calmed me down. A new but dear friend in the financial field (Suz) told me, "if you don't pass, you don't go to CFP detention!" I anticipate that I will hate to tell people I didn't pass (if that happens), but I've told people this whole time that "no we're not pregnant yet," so I'll be okay if it comes to that...but I have a new found calm right now. I'm hopeful that it will help and I have Jo to thank for that.
Now, if I haven't made you cry (what, are you made of steel? because I cried all through this post), please remember that what we value so much in life sometimes pales in comparison to life itself. And that there really are more important things than a test. Jo taught me that yesterday. (And today I learned that her newest favorite color was purple - which happens to be mine too - and all of us ladies at the hospital yesterday - J's mom, J's sister and myself - chose to wear purple, not knowing about each other or Jo. Hmmm....)
Hug the ones you love folks, because someday they may not be there to touch anymore. And say a little prayer for us...whatever you feel will help right now.
Love you Bleaders!!
(9 minutes after I posted this initially, Jo passed. Once she was moved back to the property of her assisted care facility, she let go...about an hour after arriving home. She's in no more pain.)
And a final little note, while J's parents were cleaning out her room today, they found the birthday card she had bought me (my birthday is November 23rd), it was signed and addressed, just needed a stamp. J and I both cried when he told me that. J's mom is going to send it to me. WOW, what a card that will be.
