Am I pregnant? (Don't get your hopes up, this is commentary!)

First off, I want to say thank you to all of those who commented on  my last blog My weight issue and how I get over it...or I don't.  Everyone had awesome things to say and it is greatly appreciated to hear, especially when the scale won't move an inch...seriously!  Same weight as last week, I am hoping it is because AF is lurking and next week I'll be down a bunch!  Anyway, wanted to tell you that I appreciated the thoughts of, "you are beautiful how you are," "I have envied you for ..." and "I love you because you are you."  They were much enjoyed!

Now to the main post...like I said in the title, don't get your hopes up.  But I wanted to give you an idea of the thoughts that go through my mind, when we are actively not trying.  You should imagine that when we ARE trying, this amps up A LOT!  (AF is due today and is late, but I feel like she is here.)

Whenever anything goes awry with my body, the first thought is "Could I be pregnant?"  Which is usually followed by, "shut-up already!"  So here is how often I have this thought:

Before I have a glass of wine or alcoholic drink of any kind..."should I do this?"
Before I have a cup of regular coffee (I drink decaf quite often now)..."could this hurt a potential child I might be carrying?"
Before I put sweetener in that regular or decaf coffee or regular or decaf iced tea..."should I do this?
Before I eat anything on Dr. H's "do not" list (including but not limited to feta, tuna, sushi,)..."could this hurt a potential child I might be carrying?"
Before we make big purchase..."should we save our money for prenatal care?"

When I wake up on the day AF is due and she is a no show..."Could this be it?" Even if she shows up an hour later!
When I have cramps in the middle of 2WW..."is that implantation hurting?"
When I have cramps without AF showing up on time..."is that normal pregnancy feelings?"
When there is ANY kind of spotting, be it around AF or not..."is that something with a baby that I could be carrying?"

When I am nauseous at any point in the day, even if I have just sucked down a large meal..."is this morning sickness?"
When "the girls" ache for no apparent reason..."is this a sign of pregnancy?"
When I am hot and everyone else is cold...or vice versa..."is this a sign of pregnancy?"
When every smell is THAT more intense that I recall it being before..."is this a sign I am pregnant?"
When I have a headache, when I have a toothache, when I have a runny nose, when I have watery eyes, when my teeth hurt, when my foot hurts, when my knee hurts, when my back hurts, when my eyes hurt...even though I know some of these aren't signs experienced by pregnant women, that is my first thought..."am I pregnant?"
When I easily get mad/weepy/excited/sad/enthusiastic/angry/depressed/happy..."are these pregnancy hormones doing this?"
When I wake up and feel like I haven't slept a wink..."could I be pregnant?"
When I wake up in the middle of the night to pee 2 times...or 3 times...or 1 time..."could I be pregnant?"

I hope you get the picture dear Bleader.  Even though I say we aren't trying and in my heart I feel that I need to pass the CFP (aka "big nasty") before I get pregnant, I still have these thoughts.  I try to drive them away, but they are the first thing that pops into my head.  I don't know how to make them diminish, and I surely don't know how to make them stop altogether. 

I don't know why I feel the need to tell you this, but I had these thoughts this morning because AF is due and I feel yucky, but no appearance from her.  She is always on time, and she is late.  I won't test because I know the answer, but the thoughts are there and they won't go away until we get pregnant...then new thoughts will abound until I hold that sweet child in my arms...at which new thoughts will abound. 

I guess that is it for now...and I want to have a rum and diet coke (bad on both counts) to help the pain go away, but you know what I'll be thinking before that first sip...

"But what if?"

Night Bleaders...Love you all!

Wish upon a Star

A good article my Mom gave me that made me smile.

Wish upon a Star.  I couldn't get it to copy here.  But a good story.

That's all for today folks.

My weight issue and how I get over it...or I don't.

As long as I can remember, with few instances, I have been not my ideal weight.  Don't get me wrong, there were times in my life that I weighed more than I do today - and probably weighed the same but looked very different and definitely weighed less (ahem, WEDDING!).  Don't worry, this won't be a post about me bitching about my weight (mostly)...I think.  And for most of my natural life I have been on some sort of a diet.  Or eating plan.  Then at some point, I have fallen off that and gave up caring about it all.  Many times, I have lost enough weight for myself/my family/my friends to notice and tell me how great I look, and I determine I am happy so I stop being so careful - then wake up one day a month or five months down the road and say, "Ugh!  Now I am not so happy!"  Like any person in the world, I have tried many things at different times and had them work, then not work, then work, then not work.

I was always heavier than my friends in school...any school.  All my friends were gorgeous and thin.  Maybe not rail thin, but lean.  They would exchange clothes and I would watch and want to participate but knew in my heart it wouldn't end nicely.  Now don't get me wrong, I was never HUGE...but that didn't mean I didn't feel HUGE.  There are quite a few times I can remember being truly embarrassed, or sad, or angry that I didn't look like my friends.  I hated gym (probably part of the never-ending circle of my weight - I hated gym because I was heavy, I was heavy so I hated gym, etc.) and did everything I could think of to get out of it.

I remember driving my the college campus (where I ended up for 4 years) and telling my Mom how beautiful all the girls were there and I couldn't wait to look like them.  She brought me back to reality saying, "You don't just look like that automatically, you have to work at it."  It was a revelation to me.

It was probably in late high school or early college that I really started to work out so I could fit in with all the girls I saw every day.  I took the 7 flights of stairs to my dorm room a lot.  I walked/biked to the gym, worked out, then walked/biked home.  I walked or biked all over campus to class.  I waitressed.  I took a dance class every semester.  I joined a swim team.  And I sometimes watched what I ate.  And I started to love how I looked and feel appreciated by others.  I started to have lots of dates and lots of boyfriends.  And it felt great, even if they turned out to be morons or jerks later on.  I also found my fashion sense...my fashion sense.  Not my best friend's.  Not my favorite celebrity's.  Mine.  Now don't think that I dress outlandish at all.  But I remember trying to fit into other people's styles. 

I remember shopping with my best friend for jeans at one point and struggling with fitting into them how I wanted to.  She mentioned that she sometimes did better with guy's jeans.  So we tried that.  After maybe 10 pairs, she looked at me and said, "nope, guys jeans don't work on you, you have hips!"  Again, revelation.  Maybe not like running into a brick wall, but it started to sink in.  In finding my own style, I began to see how to accentuate my assets and hide my flaws. 

Even when I was swimming 5 days a week for an hour and a half, working out at the gym the other two, waitressing 4 hours 4 nights a week, and running around campus 5 days a week to class, I wasn't far from where I am now.  I always say the weight went back to the right places.  It's not far off now, just hanging in some places that aren't appreciated.

I have this problem.  I LOVE TO EAT!  I love fruit, vegetables, meat, chicken, potatoes, bread, pasta, corn, ice cream, chocolate, crackers, chips, milk, cheese, Mexican, Italian, Thai, Chinese, sushi, breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack...you name it, I love it.  I have heard a lot that weight loss is 80% eating and 20% working out.  I have no issues with the working out...I have learned to enjoy it and kick my own ass.  I just need someone to follow me around and smack my hand when I want to eat something not-so-good for me.  That would help.  Or a personal chef...oh, but I kinda like my retirement plan where it is right now so don't expect that to happen anytime soon. 

My trainer is essential here.  Whenever we meet, once a month, I always need a pep talk and usually to be talked out of a diet crazy - last week it was the Body Bugg and Healthe Trim pills.  I know in my heart they won't work - the pills that is (and Dr. H said "hell no!"), the Bugg might but it won't match my work attire - but I need to be reminded that I need to suck it up and work harder.  And trainer does that, but not mean, just honest.  Then he kicks my ass and shows me that I can work harder.  Anyway, it happens monthly and last time he said, "we should tape these because we have the same discussion!"

This is kinda sounding like a downer, so I probably should tell you where it comes from a bit.  Nobody calls me fat but me, and maybe the occasional doctor, but even they say "only lose 10-20 lbs".  My husband has never uttered those words and almost berates me when I say it.  My friends are the same and that's why they are my friends...they pick me up when I am low.  I actually found some really cute clothes in the last couple days and not only turned dear J's head, but random men on the street.  I know because they told me...one yesterday - twice, and one this morning.  He literally mouthed "WOW" as he walked past me.  So that perked me up a bit.  Now I would never even look twice at these men over my J, but it's nice to have that experience when you are feeling low.  Here's another one I just remembered that I blogged about last year.  Anyway, I was feeling great so on my way home stopped at Ross and JCPenny's - big spender - because I was looking for specific items that they should have.  And silly Nikus, at Penny's saw bikini's on sale...and I thought, "Oh, let's just try!"  I only grabbed one and barely put the bottoms on before I felt like I had gained 100 lbs!  It looked H-O-R-R-I-D!  I couldn't get that sucker off fast enough!  Needless to say, I didn't buy it. 

I won't say I am down because of it, but I am always wishing that it didn't take so much effort to do this.  I am very happy now that I know how to dress for ME, because that helps.  But I wish the scale would agree sometimes more-so...

I also think that if I could just lose these 15 stinkin' lbs, maybe I would have to gain 30 if you know what I mean.  I know, pregnancy is not the best weight loss plan, but I still think about it!  Can I breast feed now even though we don't have a baby?

It's now 10:14 pm and I swore I would be in bed earlier tonight.  Night lovely Bleaders and thanks for listening to my rant - er, pep talk?

I love this picture because even though I am eating a heaping plate of macaroni and cheese topped with TATER TOTS, I feel like I looks skinnier...arms, face, etc.  What gives?

Annual trip to the OB/GYN (Don't worry, no TMI!)

Well, it was that time of the year.  The annual trip to the OB/GYN.  It's always a hard one for me.  Kinda like going to the weight loss doc when you haven't lost the weight yet...oh wait, I do that too! Anyway...it's sad because it is another year that I haven't called her to say "I'm pregnant!" and we both know it.  Especially, when I walk in with the big-ass fertility binder.  It's always heart-breaking and I get that look from the nurse because they know my history too.  And then I tell them over the past year I have had three IUIs and they all cringe and say they are sorry.  So how did I make this a great day?

First, let me clue you in to what I think of my OB.  I was in search of an OB about 3.5 years ago and asked a woman I swim with who is a pediatrician (and hopefully someday will be ours).  She recommended Dr. Riley.  So I went and I was instantly at ease with her.  She was honest, positive, outgoing, helpful, aware and never in a rush.  And after I left, I thought to myself, this is the woman who will birth my baby someday.  That was back in 2007. 

Then a year goes by and I start to think that I would really like someone who is closer to my house and J's work (Dr. Riley is across town and closer to my office - which is where I will probably always be when I need to go see her for ultrasounds, etc.).  And I go to my appointment expecting that I will not be as happy as I was the last time and that never happens.  I'm always impressed with her ease and passion and memory.  But mostly, her positivity.  She never shows that she is worried we won't get pregnant.  Oh, and did I mention that she had her child when she was 40?!  So she's been there too a bit. 

They had changed my appointment from 3:30 pm to 1:30 pm when they called yesterday.  I agreed to it if Dr. Riley promised to be on time...and they didn't, but I changed it anyway with the hope that since they were coming back from lunch, maybe they would be running on time.  Well, they weren't.  So I sat and read for a while and had a little break.  Finally was called in about 2 pm and then waited in the room for another 15 minutes - with my fertility binder on my lap reviewing where we had been this year.  Dr. Riley came in and as always was upbeat and smiley.  She asked how I had been and I immediately asked what was on my lap (the binder).  I told her and said, "I didn't feel right about walking around with a big binder that said - FERTILITY BINDER on it.  So I made something more fun!" She first noted how large the binder itself was (1.5")  and then how full it was with all our bills, notes, references, etc.  Then she mentioned how organized it was and how nice the cover was. 

I went on to give her a synopsis of our year - 3 IUIs, fertility drugs, stress, weightloss/weight gain, exercise and trainer while she looked through it a bit.  She listened intently and nodded a lot, indicating that she agreed with what I was saying and how I was feeling (i.e. "we have plenty of time to do this," "we aren't adding IVF to the CFP test studying," etc.)  She saw Dr. H's chart for the cost of IVF and read it over carefully.  She asked some questions and then went about her duties as my OB. 

When we were done I asked if she would be okay with me dropping off another empty version of the binder for her patients to review and possibly call me about purchasing.  She said that would be GREAT and she'd gladly show it off.  So not only do I have some incentive to do this, I have a place that people will actually see it for the audience that it is intended (pregnant women and women trying to get pregnant).  So now I just have to do it, price it and drop it off.

When the appointment was over, she wished us more luck and told me "I'll be so excited to see you when you do get pregnant!" and to study hard for the test that we had discussed.  She's just a great lady!!

So again I walk away from this appointment very happy that she is my OB and it doesn't matter how far away she is.  Plus, I always had to think twice when I went to the appointment because they only take checks and cash, no credit cards - and now they do!  I don't carry my checkbook with me ever.  For me, that is awesome and makes it all easier - because as today, I forgot the check and had to go get cash, then didn't need it. 

I survived the appointment without tears and with more hope that this will happen for us at some point.  If you need a good OB, I got one!

Night Bleaders...<3.

Less Stress Please!

WOWIE ZOWIE have the last few days (with the exception of the weekend) been intense!

First, Fri I found out some sad news from a close friend about her hubby's friend's family and her dog (I won't share...not my place).  Then I battled with our mortgage company to have them explain WTF they are doing...they are morons.  We pay our bill, they show it paid, then they show it unpaid...no particular reason!  Finally, I was in for drinks with a friend and that was lovely (Thanks to the lovely Red, who had the impossible task of calming me down - well, her and the margaritas!!)  And then friends came over for burgers and that helped.

The weekend was grand! Met Busted Kate for mani/pedis, then lunch with her and her hubby (finally got to meet the illusive Adam...he rocks!) at Old Chicago watching the USA vs. England game (I know little about soccer), then home to grab J for our visit to the movies to watch The A-Team.  We were both huge fans as kids, so we had to go and I will say it rocked!  Plus, Bradley Cooper is kinda beautiful and he was half naked a lot, so I was in heaven!  After the movie, we tried a new place for dinner that Busted Kate had recommended by the theater and it was great.  (I will interject that a little stress came in here because some old friends walked in that we haven't seen for ages and kinda had a falling out with, but we sucked it up and said hello and it ended very happily!  Now I get to call them friends again!).  Then home to hop in the jacuzzi and chat with my hubby.

Sunday, I swam (YAY ME!) and then ran errands, cleaned stuff around the house, finally set up my sewing machine that I think I bought in April, and figured out how to hem my own pants for the first time ever.  It only took me an hour or so of getting the machine set up and figuring out how it all worked different than the one at my Mom's that is 5 years older than me!

That brings us to Monday.  I can't elaborate a lot because I can't talk about work stuff here, but let's just say some sad stuff happened at the office and now some other stuff will happen too.  I gotta stop there.  On my way home, I stopped at the jeweler that I had dropped my ring at that I blogged about to see what the estimate was to recreate it and...are you ready..............................sit down...........................it will cost................................$8,600!  Now it will have real diamonds, real gold and look AWESOME...but essentially that is the cost of IVF!  So I don't think we'll be doing that anytime soon.  Anyway, I came home and had 2 glasses of wine.

And then today...OY!  Every-so-often, I can afford to have our housekeeper come and today was that day.  To say I stopped cleaning the house about 3 weeks ago because I knew she was coming, is an understatement.  I let it go!  Anyway, the lovely lady showed up at 8:30 am just as J was leaving and I let her in happily.  She started stripping our bed and going to it.  I heard our kitty (nicknamed "Psycho Cat" by my in-laws) hiss at her once - which, sadly, is normal.  Then I heard it again, and again, and again, and growling!  So I bolted upstairs, to find my poor housekeeper on the bed with the cat trying to get her feet from under the bed!  And the cat was making noises like you would believe...somehow, she became a lion! And a pig!  And a snake!  OY!  Scooted housekeeper to a different part of the house to let kitty simmer down, but she just wouldn't.  And she wouldn't come out from under the bed or let ME near her.  I gave up!  I went down and got J's welding gloves and a yard stick and poked at her until she ran out from under the bed.  It sounds horrible, but I had to be able to get her.  Finally, got close and she ran downstairs and jumped on top of our cabinets.

Now picture this, me with huge welding gloves on, standing on a step-ladder trying to grab the cat that is spitting at me, growling at me, grunting at me, hissing at me, and lunging at me!  After about 30 minutes, I was near tears and sweating like I was in the desert (and outside) and had to call the cavalry.  I called J and begged him to come home.  I begged.  He flew home (and I should note here that J is our kitty's favorite person in the world...sometimes I think she tries to bump me off so he can be all hers - when I get out of bed, she crawls into my spot beside him!) and began to try to calm her down.  After another 45 minutes of random things (i.e. talking soothingly, giving her more meds, spraying her with water, him wearing the gloves) he was able to convince her to jump down and somehow got her to crawl into her kitty carrier.  I told our housekeeper she could come out from hiding and finish...kitty wouldn't kill her.  But neither of us could walk by the carrier for the rest of the day without hearing hissing!  J went back to work and so did I and so did our housekeeper - God love her for staying and making my house look AWESOME!

Kitty has calmed now, but will be sleeping in exile for some time (being the guest bathroom) until we figure out what is wrong.  Seems J had lowered her drug dosage (yes, she is on Paxil) and he went too low.  Plus I freaked her out with the gloves and yard stick, and housekeeper must have scared her or something because she has NEVER done this!  She's been bad, but this was terrifying!

So I am now heading downstairs for my wine again, and some dinner.  And hopefully some relaxing.  It's been an OY kind of day!

It didn't work

Hi folks, for those who got the email post of the blog, the video didn't send, so go here to see it. 

Sorry, I'm not super good at this computer stuff...but the clip shows how I feel EXACTLY!

Nikus

Spot...who sees a spot?

I haven't been really concentrating on all the baby-making stuff lately, just living life - busy, busy life.  More on that later.  Anyway, last week when I posted that I was upset about the 3 lb gain, I emailed my trainer for some happy thoughts and being the smart fellah that he is, he asked, "Where are you on your female cycle?"  I can tell he toiled on how to phrase that for a while, but he and I talk about that because of all the fertility stuff...he's a tough cookie.  After laughing at the phrasing, I replied that I wasn't due until Saturday and this was odd.  I did let the day get me down and ate my way through it because I was STARVING.  Of course if anything crazy happens, I automatically jump to "pregnant?!"

Well, the next morning there was a surprise waiting for me.  My heart sank and I didn't work out...because I figured AF had arrived early.  But no cramps...so still kinda thinking "pregnant" but then also thinking, "damn, are we back to this again?"  Anyway, that evening, nothing.  And the next morning, the full fledged pain was there.  So where I thought I was doing so well with no spotting for 5 months, that was annihilated last week when it began again.  I could hope that this is just a fluke, but I am afraid to get excited about that.  Maybe this is God's way of telling me it is time to go back to eating healthy a lot more, since I have been slacking lately.

Hmm...what else?  Stopped at the jeweler on the way home to see if they could re-create my beloved ring.  Seeing as they sent me to the place to get it replated, I knew they would feel bad.  Actually talked to the guy who recommended it, and he let me play out my sob story before I showed it to me.  I hate to even look at it now, but in there among the other gorgeous things, it just felt dirty!  He was sweet and agreed with me that they had messed it up (having seen it in most of its' glory).  Hopefully the price they come back with to re-create it doesn't break the bank, but won't know until we hear back.  Right now it has cubic zirconias in it ("diamonds"), so he suggested a different stone that would be cheaper.  I'm interested to see how they come back.

That's about it for now.  I weigh in tomorrow and not really sure which way it will go.  Hopefully at least down a little bit!

A little bit of explanation for my absentness lately...I'm in the middle of my last class for CFP (aka "big nasty") before I start studying for that.  Plus got a little behind with all the traveling in May, so in addition to class and studying for class, there is work, working out, and trying to have some fun in there.  Just a lot going on all at once, but definitely studying is the brunt of it...even on the weekends!  YUK!  Almost done, then the real fun begins, but the test isn't until November...so at least not such a crazy schedule...just a lot of crazy information to cram into my head!  I feel like Kelly Bundy from Married with Children when she is on the game show and forgets the winning answer because only so much fit in her head!  ARGH! (I did manage to find the clip, let's hope it works!)



It's hot in AZ right now...really hot.  It's 100 degrees out at 9:22 pm!  OY!  I'm heading to bed for some relaxing time before my eyelids have to open again to walk with my pregnant Anna tomorrow early early.  What will I do when she pops?  I'll need another walking buddy.  The last two I have walked with have gotten pregnant fast...anyone up for some good karma?

Thanks for sticking with me Bleaders, even when I don't write a lot.

I have a drawer

I have a drawer full of baby things...I started collecting them when we started trying (3 years ago next month - WOW!).  It wasn't anything I was buying for the most part.  Trinkets mostly from baby showers or baby fairs, or whatever.  At one point, I did buy a baby University of Arizona jersey because it was pretty cheap and the store selling it was closing.  I hesitated for probably a half hour in the store, but being a die-hard U of A fan, I couldn't pass it up.  I really try not to buy things for the baby drawer (which at one point was kept in the changing table I gave back to my friend), but every so often, something pops up that ends up in there. 

When I started knitting big time, I dug out my old baby blanket for sizing purposes (complete with the hole and the safety pin holding the hole together), so that went in the drawer instead of back in the box.  The U of A jersey.  The baby fair stuff when I went with Ms. T when she was pregnant with baby #2 (he's now almost 2).  And most recently, a book. 

I went to a baby shower today (with the finished the blanket that I finished last night at midnight) and we were requested to bring a book instead of a card.  While I was looking for a book, I happened upon one that I remember liking as a child so I bought it for my friend, along with two of my favorite Disney stories (Snow White and Beauty and the Beast).  I was intending to give her all 3 books.  But as they sat and sat on the counter, waiting to be wrapped, I just couldn't give it up.  So into the drawer it went.  But I can't stand there very long looking at that drawer...that is pretty full at this point.  I just keep feeling like I am shooting myself in the foot or wasting money when I buy something for the drawer.  Because at this point, there is no baby.

Will these things ever get used?  You all know the answer to that...I surely hope so.

I'm really down today.  Don't get me wrong, today had it's highlights - my hair for one.  But it started off with a late start because my alarm didn't go off.  Anyway, on my way there I stopped to pick up a ring I had dropped off to have replated because the gold was coming off and when they gave it back to me it was destroyed.  Not just bad looking, horrid!  Unwearable.  And it is one of my favorite rings that is now discontinued from the company I got it from.  It was just a bad situation when I picked it up to.  Nevermind that they had it for 2 weeks, during which time I thought they were fixing it, not wrecking it and losing stones so no one else can fix it.  I got my money back, but then the owner of the store started getting angry because I was asking them to do something impossible.  To which I replied, "I would have rather you said that than ruin my ring!"  So now I am bummed.  I like my hair cut and color and I did have fun at the shower, but this has made me sad today.

I'm done bitching.  It's time for alcohol.

Hope you Bleaders are having a better day than me.

Not much to say

Hello Bleaders, thank you for sticking with me.  At this point, I really don't have a lot to say...well, I do, I just don't have the time to write it.  I would usually find a break in my day to write about something, but lately I don't have breaks in my day.  With school and work and WW and working out and being a wife, I'm full.  I know life will be even fuller whenever we have a baby, but for now, it is full enough!

A couple short notes and then it is time for a shower.

BFF Melslaw was in town this weekend for her sister's graduation from HS so we got to hang out a bit, even though I had just seen her in San Fran for her birthday.  But probably won't get to see her again  until Christmas.  We went to lunch, dinner (different day), saw Iron Man 2 and I convinced her to go with me to the gym to try my workout routine.  I think she was impressed....at least I got that impression as she was panting and sweating through what I do.  Always good to see her...I do love her so!

Ah...the foot.  I may have mentioned this before I left for San Fran (I don't recall!) but my foot/ankle has been hurting me for some time now.  It started right before I left for San Fran and my only thoughts at the time were, "G-R-E-A-T, the one time where I know I'll be walking a lot and have the Bay to Breakers to do too!"  I had made a quick trip to the chiropractor, thinking he was the only one who might give me immediate relief, but it didn't help that much.  (Essentially, the bottom of my foot started to hurt about 3 weeks ago...along the right side.  Everyone would tell you it is because I wear heels, but when I would wear the heels, the pain would go away.  Go figure?!  As it progressed, it started to creep up my ankle - probably because I was walking differently due to the pain.  And it only hurts on days I walk with my friend, not days I go to the gym and workout.  Very odd and annoying!)  Finally, I gave in and went to the doctor on Friday.  Well, the Nurse Practitioner.  Got there for my 11 am appt at 10:50 am, and sat, and sat, and sat, and sat.  Finally, at NOON they came out and called me in.  I was a bit steamed, especially at myself because I hadn't brought my school books and I had just wasted a good hour.  She was in pretty quick after that (maybe another 15 mins) and poked around at my foot and asked questions.  Determined it was either Plantar Fasciitis or a minor fracture, so scheduled x-rays.  At this point, I am now starving so rush home to eat lunch and then off to the x-ray, this time with my school books.  Checked in, sat down, got called...maybe not that quickly, but very quickly!  They took maybe 5 different x-rays and told me the doc would call that day if it was serious or next week (this week) if it wasn't.  (Oh, and as I am taking off my shoes the technician says, "Is there a chance you are pregnant?"  That caught me off guard and I paused and said, "Well, there always a chance."  He replied, "should we not do the x-ray?"  To which I said, "We have been trying for 3 years, if this is the one time that I am pregnant when I need an x-ray, that is a really cruel joke.  We do the x-ray!" He laughed, but I think it was more nervous than funny.  Anyway, we did the x-ray!) No call Friday so I'm going with non-serious.  Let me also say this, I have issues with my ankles.  I have fractured and sprained the right one (the one giving me issue now) multiple times.  OY!

Hmmm...what else?  WW.  I weighed this morning and am up almost 3 lbs!  What the heck? I was good all week...heck, even great!  I worked out all days but 1 and ate much better.  3 lbs in a week is like I am on vacation!  What the heck? I ate well this week and not like I ate steak, I ate healthily!  OY VEY!  Of course the thought, "maybe I'm pregnant" goes flying through my brain but I think it would be impossible this cycle because I was gone during the right time of the month and if anything happens with my body lately, I think that.  Sad, but true.  So I am annoyed!  I will email my trainer for a pep talk!

I think that is about all I got!  Told ya, not much else going on in life except for studying! And more studying!  I'll be very glad when this class is over.  I was supposed to have Jury Duty today (rescheduled from when I was in Vegas), but I got excused!  YAY ME!  Other than that, I'm empty!

Hope you had a great Memorial Day weekend!  If you are a veteran or acting military, police, fire department, border patrol, or anything that defends our freedoms, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for your service.  Or your spouse's service.  Or your parent's service.  Or your sibling's service.  Or your friend's service.  What you do for us everyday makes this country so great and you aren't appreciated enough!  God Bless and thank you or your loved one for protecting us all!